21/03/2024

When Wendy and Tony’s daughter started bringing home friends from families needing a hand, the couple never expected that to lead to a foster care journey spanning almost four decades.

Wendy and Tony fostered more than 330 children over about 38 years, before they moved from Port Augusta to Adelaide last month and retired from the role.

They had three of their own biological children – Tony, Leticia and Angelia, and also raised four of their nieces and nephews over a number of years, eventually becoming foster carers for other children in 1984.

Tony says he and Wendy wanted to try and make life a little easier for as many vulnerable children as they could.

“Kids would tell our daughter (Leticia) about what was happening at home….. and she started bringing the kids home from school,” he says.

Tony and Wendy became approved foster carers for children in short and longer-term arrangements, including many who still keep in touch with the family and return regularly, or for special occasions, such as Christmas and Easter.

At any one time they had up to 10 children at home, and supporting them was no mean feat as Tony worked long stints away as an earthmover and Wendy stayed home with the children.

“Sometimes it takes them months and months to open up,” Tony says of the children they’ve cared for, with Wendy adding she enjoyed seeing young people become more comfortable once they got to know the family.

“The smiles on their faces was the biggest achievement for me, instead of them staying up most of the night, not being able to sleep and having nightmares and flashbacks,” she says.

“I sat up for many a night with these kids on my own, so they wouldn’t be scared – that’s what showed them that there was somebody there for them.”

Although the couple have retired as carers, they still have 18-year-old Ebanee at home, who came to live with them as a youngster.

Tony says his relationship with Ebanee grew, as she came to understand that she could trust him to be there when she needed him.

“She wouldn’t go into a shop on her own so I used to go with her, then I got to a stage where I’d be able to be one aisle away from her, then I stayed at the door of the shop but she’d be looking back all the time at me, then I’d sit in the car and she’d go in by herself,” he says.

“But now, because she got used to knowing I’d still be there, she’ll jump in the car and go on her own. And it all started from moving back a few paces at a time.”

Tony says Ebanee was chuffed that the couple retired just after her 18th birthday, because she got to be their “last kid”.

The couple’s children spent about two years trying to convince the pair it was time to focus on themselves, eventually winning their case.

“It’s hard not doing it anymore, because I know there’s a lot of kids out there who could do with some help,” Tony says.

Minister for Child Protection Katrine Hildyard said the extraordinary positive impact of foster carers like Tony and Wendy transformed children’s lives.

“Through Tony and Wendy’s enormous hearts and remarkable generosity, they have had a ripple effect across generations. Their choosing to open their home and hearts and to provide love and care to so many children and young people over nearly 40 years is inspiring,” she said.

“I wholeheartedly thank them for their commitment to providing love, care and safety; they have helped so many young people know that there is someone there for them, particularly in their hardest moments.”

“I wish Tony and Wendy the very best in their retirement, and offer them immense gratitude for the incredible difference they have made to the happiness and wellbeing of hundreds of young people.”

The couple were supported as foster carers by Uniting Country SA, and chief executive Dr Harry Randhawa said their dedication was “truly remarkable”.

“Thank you for everything, and we hope you have a fabulous retirement,” he said.

“Tony and Wendy's outstanding dedication as foster carers is truly commendable.

“We are hopeful to connect with more individuals who share their passion for providing a loving home to children in our community."

For more information on foster care, call 1300 2 FOSTER (1300 2 367 837) or visit www.fostercare.sa.gov.au